corobel/samples/cohost/api/v1/vogon_pathological.json

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"headline": "Black-Throated Blue Warbler (on Twig)",
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"content": "so last time I talked about warblers I was bemoaning their microtraits and the difficulty of identifying them."
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"content": "well, not this guy. he isn't even yellow!"
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"content": "the <a href=\"https://www.allaboutbirds.org/guide/Black-Throated_Blue_Warbler/\" title=\"AllAboutBirds.org\"><strong>Black-Throated Blue Warbler</strong></a> is just what it says on the tin, and I've seen them hopping around the base of tree trunks, headstones, and compost bins. They don't mind getting down to earth and real, rapping straight talk with the youth."
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"content": "OK I've never seen them rap straight talk with the youth but I don't think they're above it. I think they would be cool with it if the situation came up."
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"content": "the way you square this circle, of course, is:"
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"content": "* twitter isn't actually privately owned by him, only operated -- he had to get a ton of backing from the finance industry to purchase it, and will presumably be serving at their pleasure, which means he's basically just a shit umbrella[^1] for a bunch of private equity companies and will eventually be the scapegoat for them stealing all of the copper out of the walls;\n* as we [know from seeing his text messages](https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2022/09/elon-musk-texts-twitter-trial-jack-dorsey/671619/), elon's friends are a who's-who of the tech *status quo*, and a lot of them explicitly gushed to him about how profitable the company could be if you made the advertising even worse and more intrusive"
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"content": "[^1]: a phrase I learned from my first boss self-describing his role as a manager, intended to connote that the metaphorical shit is coming from above him and he's the one bearing the brunt of stopping it from falling on you"
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"content": "\"My friend's driver side window doesn't open, so we had to improvise.\""
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"content": "this thread reminded me that when I was working at microsoft, I was in a business unit that had previously been a startup; the acquisition closed a few months before I started working there. I worked on voice recognition software for cell phones, but the bigger part of the company worked on \"interactive voice response\", which is the industry term for voice-activated phone trees."
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"content": "unfortunately if there's a secret backdoor to these things I never learned it[^1], but what I did learn is that all of our products -- our IVRs included -- had an earcon[^2] when you first launched them for branding purposes[^3], and if you get a normal level of furious when you call whatever megacorp and hit a phone tree, you get at least 50% more furious when you call in, hear a two-note jingle you hear at work all day, and know that someone you've met irl is responsible for designing and implementing the circle of hell you currently find yourself in"
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"content": "[^1]: the deals for most of these things -- at least at the time -- had a service level agreement about how many calls were handled purely by the automated system. don't hit your targets? the company buying IVR service from you gets a discount. so putting in a backdoor is an easy way to not make money.\n[^2]: the audio equivalent of an icon. get it? eyecon?\n[^3]: branding was important, I think, so that in meetings with some corporate executive, we could play the earcon and suddenly they would flash back to the last time they called their bank or whatever, be overcome with awe, and whip out the corporate checkbook"
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"content": "i'm in the East Bay, like 15 minutes out from Oakland. i'm listening to the one good jazz station (shout out to 91.1 KCSM) and i'm getting a bit bored of the current tune. they can't all be winners. anyway i set my iPod radio to scan through to find something else. it lands on a station playing [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veaBmJhPtvA). i'm like \"yeah it's after midnight and im wide awake, lets dance\" so i stay put on 92.7."
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"content": "after DJ Jean got us completely and thoroughly ready for the launch, a station identification plays. it's got all the flashy over-the-top sound design you'd expect and a voice with a slightly british accent goes***92.7 P-p-p-p-pirate radio. The 24/7 soiree never stops!*** "
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"content": "[this tune](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfW4MzXN7VU) starts up, but at this point i'm more focused on trying to make sure i had heard that correctly. "
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"content": "surely that's... they wouldn't just SAY that out loud right? there's no way i just stumbled onto an illegal broadcast, this is some weird branding for someone trying to compete with clearchannel/iheartradio or SOMETHING. "
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"content": "so i go online to find out what the hell 92.7 FM is. it's... unclear. skimming wikipedia shows there was some court stuff over the ownership and that it seems somewhat ongoing. as far as i can tell, the FCC filing for whatever it used to be is inactive and there are no current active licenses. another station ident plays***We rave The Bay... 365, 7 days a week, 24/7. It's the all new Pirate 92.7!***, [new song](https://youtu.be/gbcG2TI4GBk). notice how they keep avoiding giving out a callsign. that's not a valid station ident!! that clinches it for me. this is an illegal FM broadcast."
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"content": "HELL YEAH"
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"content": "HOW COOL IS THAT"
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"content": "i grab my handy dandy focusrite scarlett and plug it into my ipod. i record about 30 minutes of the broadcast because i want to preserve some of these station idents. i got a fantastically weird one that goes like***And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music [40 dubstep sounds] Pirate 92.7!*** "
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"content": "i wanted to record more but my iPod dies and then i get very sleepy and go to bed (at this point it's like 1:30am). i wake up around 10. unplug the iPod from the charger, plug in the radio dongle, plug in my headphones, tune to the station. dead fucking silence. *i was told the 24/7 soiree never stops and yet here i am listening to not-even-static.* hopefully this just means they only broadcast late at night because i want more pirate radio. yeah, sure, at one point they played a Chainsmokers song and i wanted to vomit."
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"plainTextBody": "i'm in the East Bay, like 15 minutes out from Oakland. i'm listening to the one good jazz station (shout out to 91.1 KCSM) and i'm getting a bit bored of the current tune. they can't all be winners. anyway i set my iPod radio to scan through to find something else. it lands on a station playing [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veaBmJhPtvA). i'm like \"yeah it's after midnight and im wide awake, lets dance\" so i stay put on 92.7.\n\nafter DJ Jean got us completely and thoroughly ready for the launch, a station identification plays. it's got all the flashy over-the-top sound design you'd expect and a voice with a slightly british accent goes***92.7 P-p-p-p-pirate radio. The 24/7 soiree never stops!*** \n\n[this tune](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfW4MzXN7VU) starts up, but at this point i'm more focused on trying to make sure i had heard that correctly. \n\ndid it just self identify as a pirate radio station?\n\n---\n\nsurely that's... they wouldn't just SAY that out loud right? there's no way i just stumbled onto an illegal broadcast, this is some weird branding for someone trying to compete with clearchannel/iheartradio or SOMETHING. \n\nso i go online to find out what the hell 92.7 FM is. it's... unclear. skimming wikipedia shows there was some court stuff over the ownership and that it seems somewhat ongoing. as far as i can tell, the FCC filing for whatever it used to be is inactive and there are no current active licenses. another station ident plays***We rave The Bay... 365, 7 days a week, 24/7. It's the all new Pirate 92.7!***, [new song](https://youtu.be/gbcG2TI4GBk). notice how they keep avoiding giving out a callsign. that's not a valid station ident!! that clinches it for me. this is an illegal FM broadcast.\n\nHELL YEAH\n\nHOW COOL IS THAT\n\ni grab my handy dandy focusrite scarlett and plug it into my ipod. i record about 30 minutes of the broadcast because i want to preserve some of these station idents. i got a fantastically weird one that goes like***And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music [40 dubstep sounds] Pirate 92.7!*** \n\ni wanted to record more but my iPod dies and then i get very sleepy and go to bed (at this point it's like 1:30am). i wake up around 10. unplug the iPod from the charger, plug in the radio dongle, plug in my headphones, tune to the station. dead fucking silence. *i was told the 24/7 soiree never stops and yet here i am listening to not-even-static.* hopefully this just means they only broadcast late at night because i want more pirate radio. yeah, sure, at one point they played a Chainsmokers song and i wanted to vomit.\n\nbut it was illegal. and it was beautiful",
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"content": "a couple months ago, i gave [a talk](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5mMOsQDjJc) with katherine @morayati at [narrascope 2022](http://www.narrascope.org) about what we termed interface fiction: games that tell stories primarily through computer interfaces, simulated or non-simulated. during the talk, i mentioned that i've been obsessed for nearly two decades by *majestic* (2001), a good example of interface fiction and one of the earliest and most extensive big-budget ARGs. "
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"content": "if you're not familiar, majestic was a subscription-based game that would be \"played\" through phone calls, emails, instant messages, and faxes. at specific, scheduled intervals (that the player would define upon registering with the game), majestic characters would contact the player by phoning them, emailing them, etc., to deliver a story beat, a clue to a puzzle, or further information about what was happening. the idea was that the player, unexpectedly at the centre of a giant government conspiracy, would never be able to predict when, where, or how the next part of the game would present itself. if you were twelve years old like lil ol' me when this was announced, this was the coolest possible game that could have ever existed. "
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"content": "long story short, the game failed mostly because it was released two months before 9/11 (aka the most hilarious possible time to release a government conspiracy game where shadowy folks call you and email you and so forth). it lasted about nine months or so and is now completely unplayable. i won't go into further detail about its creation and demise because phil salvador (@shadsy) has already written a brilliant post about majestic on his blog the Obscuritory — i really recommend checking it out [here](https://obscuritory.com/other/majestic/). "
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"content": "instead, i want to show off that i recently bought a copy of majestic on ebay, like a true freak. "
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"content": "i think the reason i find majestic so compelling is that it's the inverse of most modern game preservation. emulation has (thankfully, rightfully) has made it easier than ever to preserve games across platforms & across decades, regardless of whether physical copies exist or not. but with majestic, i have a physical copy in my hands; the CD is in my CD-ROM; i've installed it on my fancy modern pc perfectly fine; the central messaging hub is literally running in the background as we speak, waiting for me to log in... and yet not only can the game never be played again, there's *so little available* about what the game consisted of, what its narrative was, or how it worked. "
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"content": "i've been trying to find as much as i possibly can about this game by trawling through the CD (which basically has a copy of aol instant messager, realplayer, and little else) and the strategy guide. the guide has been helpful because it points you in the direction of some websites that have been saved by the internet archive:"
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"content": "- the main [majestic website](https://web.archive.org/web/20010517002207/http://www.majestic.ea.com/)\n- [the studio website for Anim-X](https://web.archive.org/web/20010801150816/http://www.anim-x.com/html/games.html#), the fictional game studio that burns down at the beginning of the game, propelling the player into the whole conspiracy\n- [the about page](https://web.archive.org/web/20010801180853/http://www.anim-x.com/html/about.html) for Anim-X\n- [a q&a section](https://web.archive.org/web/20010801164824/http://www.anim-x.com/html/forum.html) regarding majestic. some of these seem legit; others seem fictionalised. lots of people asking the studio for a job. nothing has changed!\n- a brief description of [Ketherren](https://web.archive.org/web/20010821004621/http://www.anim-x.com/html/keth.html), Anim-X's \"first game\" (which, according to a dev post in the q&a section, was only a \"kiosk\" game. supposedly, the second game, \"Cold War\", was cancelled with elements being incorporated into majestic.)\n- [a fake development diary](https://web.archive.org/web/20011003203653fw_/http://www.anim-x.com/html/diary.html), including interviews with not-real Anim-X employees Mike Griffin (director of technology), Kendra Moore (lead artist), and Shintaro Nishiki (game designer). according to the strategy guide, these folks are central characters in the game. (there appear to be clues in the interview: Brian mentions his car was torched, and Kendra says there's a \"freaky atmosphere around here, like those prank phone calls weve been getting.\")\n- [shadowhost.net](https://web.archive.org/web/20010805134345/http://www.shadowhost.net/), which hosted Kendra's personal website. the shadowhost definition of the day: \"paranoia.\" (insert i know writers who uses subtext and they're all cowards.jpg here)\n- from shadowhost, there's a link to their \"Member Page of the Day\": [FreeDaUSA](https://web.archive.org/web/20010602104230/http://www.shadowhost.net/members/FreeDaUSA/). anti-government ultra-rightwing sentiment?! on the internet?! \n- a news report from the [portland chronicle](https://web.archive.org/web/20001206204300/http://www.portlandchronicle.com/) detailing the explosion that burned down Anim-X"
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"content": "unfortunately, it looks like any other website that was listed in the strategy guide was walled behind cookies or some other authentication, so they weren't scraped by the archive. so beyond these websites, and the written walkthrough of episode one in the strategy guide... this is all i've got. there's a behind the scenes video on the CD (which looks to be the same as [this EPK](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yG0oY8obuGU)) and some cheesy electronic music, but little else."
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"content": "**if anyone has any other information about this game, how it was played, or what the story was all about... let me know. and if folks want me to transcribe the strategy guide... let me know that as well.**"
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"content": "for the time being, i'll just leave majestic running in my taskbar, waiting for someone to phone. "
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"plainTextBody": "a couple months ago, i gave [a talk](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u5mMOsQDjJc) with katherine @morayati at [narrascope 2022](http://www.narrascope.org) about what we termed interface fiction: games that tell stories primarily through computer interfaces, simulated or non-simulated. during the talk, i mentioned that i've been obsessed for nearly two decades by *majestic* (2001), a good example of interface fiction and one of the earliest and most extensive big-budget ARGs. \n\nif you're not familiar, majestic was a subscription-based game that would be \"played\" through phone calls, emails, instant messages, and faxes. at specific, scheduled intervals (that the player would define upon registering with the game), majestic characters would contact the player by phoning them, emailing them, etc., to deliver a story beat, a clue to a puzzle, or further information about what was happening. the idea was that the player, unexpectedly at the centre of a giant government conspiracy, would never be able to predict when, where, or how the next part of the game would present itself. if you were twelve years old like lil ol' me when this was announced, this was the coolest possible game that could have ever existed. \n\nlong story short, the game failed mostly because it was released two months before 9/11 (aka the most hilarious possible time to release a government conspiracy game where shadowy folks call you and email you and so forth). it lasted about nine months or so and is now completely unplayable. i won't go into further detail about its creation and demise because phil salvador (@shadsy) has already written a brilliant post about majestic on his blog the Obscuritory — i really recommend checking it out [here](https://obscuritory.com/other/majestic/). \n\ninstead, i want to show off that i recently bought a copy of majestic on ebay, like a true freak. \n\ni think the reason i find majestic so compelling is that it's the inverse of most modern game preservation. emulation has (thankfully, rightfully) has made it easier than ever to preserve games across platforms & across decades, regardless of whether physical copies exist or not. but with majestic, i have a physical copy in my hands; the CD is in my CD-ROM; i've installed it on my fancy modern pc perfectly fine; the central messaging hub is literally running in the background as we speak, waiting for me to log in... and yet not only can the game never be played again, there's *so little available* about what the game consisted of, what its narrative was, or how it worked. \n\ni've been trying to find as much as i possibly can about this game by trawling through the CD (which basically has a copy of aol instant messager, realplayer, and little else) and the strategy guide. the guide has been helpful because it points you in the direction of some websites that have been saved by the internet archive:\n\n- the main [majestic website](https://web.archive.org/web/20010517002207/http://www.majestic.ea.com/)\n- [the studio website for Anim-X](https://web.archive.org/web/20010801150816/http://www.anim-x.com/html/games.html#), the fictional game studio that burns down at the beginning of the game, propelling the player into the whole conspiracy\n- [the about page](https://web.archive.org/web/20010801180853/http://www.anim-x.com/html/about.html) for Anim-X\n- [a q&a section](https://web.archive.org/web/20010801164824/http://www.anim-x.com/html/forum.html) regarding majestic. some of these seem legit; others seem fictionalised. lots of people asking the studio for a job. nothing has changed!\n- a brief description of [Ketherren](https://web.archive.org/web/20010821004621/http://www.anim-x.com/html/keth.html), Anim-X's \"first game\" (which, according to a dev post in the q&a section, was only a \"kiosk\" game. supposedly, the second game, \"Cold War\", was cancelled with elements being incorporated into majestic.)\n- [a fake development diary](https://web.archive.org/web/20011003203653fw_/http://www.anim-x.com/html/diary.html), including interviews with not-real Anim-X employees Mike Griffin (director of technology), Kendra Moore (lead artist), and Shintaro Nishiki (game designer). according to the strategy guide, these folks are central characters in the game. (there appear to be clues in the interview: Brian mentions his car was torched, and Kendra says there's a \"freaky atmosphere around here, like those prank phone calls weve been getting.\")\n- [shadowhost.net](https://web.archive.org/web/20010805134345/http://www.shadowhost.net/), which hosted Kendra's personal website. the shadowhost definition of the day: \"paranoia.\" (insert i know writers who uses subtext and they're all cowards.jpg here)\n- from shadowhost, there's a link to their \"Member Page of the Day\": [FreeDaUSA](https://web.archive.org/web/20010602104230/http://www.shadowhost.net/members/FreeDaUSA/). anti-government ultra-rightwing sentiment?! on the internet?! \n- a news report from the [portland chronicle](https://web.archive.org/web/20001206204300/http://www.portlandchronicle.com/) detailing the explosion that burned down Anim-X\n\nunfortunately, it looks like any other website that was listed in the strategy guide was walled behind cookies or some other authentication, so they weren't scraped by the archive. so beyond these websites, and the written walkthrough of episode one in the strategy guide... this is all i've got. there's a behind the scenes video on the CD (which looks to be the same as [this EPK](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yG0oY8obuGU)) and some cheesy electronic music, but little else.\n\n**if anyone has any other information about this game, how it was played, or what the story was all about... let me know. and if folks want me to transcribe the strategy guide... let me know that as well.**\n\nfor the time being, i'll just leave majestic running in my taskbar, waiting for someone to phone. 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"content": "I totally understand the bandwidth limitations of that sort of thing, but frankly I wouldn't even mind if all videos got scrunched down to 480p if it just means we get any sort of video functionality at all. Even make it a Cohost+ feature or smthn, it'd be totally justifiable to have to pay for that, since your video posts would objectively cost more to host and serve."
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"content": "my first instinct was to say \"this is just [malbolge](https://www.wikiwand.com/en/Malbolge)\" but I think you can do better than this -- while the mapping between source code and operations in malbolge is an absolute nightmare, it's the same nightmare every time for the same input program"
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"content": "GAME: [Dark Magic](https://flord69.itch.io/dark-magic)"
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"content": "(This game's assets were created using a 3D character creation & posing tool called [Honey Select](https://www.fakku.net/games/honey-select-unlimited-english). Since Honey Select is specifically designed for creating pornographic scenes, it obviously does not contain any models of children. So, what's a developer to do when they want to give a character meant to be a prototypical MILF a toddler-sized child? Make the skinniest, shortest adult possible and hope for the best, it seems. Her hands haunt me.)"
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